A new chapter.

Posted on May 15, 2016 by thewhineconnoisseur

When I met my husband, he was a long haired hippie living pretty much paycheck to paycheck. He took the bus to work at a call center where he would cold call for the sales department of a company in the hospitality industry. I would drive him when I could, but due to conflicting schedules and how far apart our jobs were, 8 times out of 10 he was on his own to get to work. As time went by, he ended up impressing the right people and got hired on directly for the company that he’d been cold calling for. He then had to take the bus even farther across town to their headquarters every day for several months until he could finally afford his own car. He never complained about it… he simply did what he had to do to get where he wanted to be in the professional world. One of the most determined people I have ever known, he worked his way up the totem pole and he hustled day in and day out for several years with that company to provide a good life for our family. Today however, I am proud to announce that he has been hired on as a Senior Sales Executive at an even bigger company, and I could not be more proud of that man.

The last few months have been a total whirlwind for us. Once he was approached with the opportunity, we were torn to say the least. Change is scary, especially when it could effect the entire course of your family’s journey. We were posed with the choice between sticking it out at a company that had provided my husband with an amazing stepping stone into the sales world, and a company that was far more established in the sales world. The choice between a company that my husband was successful at but had honestly outgrown, or a company that we were unfamiliar with but who offered a whole new world of opportunity and advancement.

In making our decision, we looked to respected family and friends for advice and support (thank you all, you know who you are), but we mostly looked to the signs. As we sat back and watched the situation unfold, it could not be mistaken that we were being guided towards the right decision. The decision to leave all that we had known for the last four years. The decision to take a risk. The decision that could get our family ahead by leaps and bounds. So, hearts racing and holding hands…we took a leap of faith.

The transition will not be easy, but it will be worth it. It requires my husband to spend the next three months across the country from us for training. I have been spoiled and lucky in the fact that I have not spent more than a couple of days away from him since our first date, and I certainly wasn’t prepared to start now. But life had other plans and we will try to make the best of it. He will be flying home every so often to check in very briefly and we will be planning a trip for my son and I to visit him mid summer. Additionally, his new job is allowing us to still go on a couple of the small vacations that we had planned out prior to the job offer, and those vacations will probably be our saving grace.

Today I dropped my best friend off at the airport and it was one of the hardest things that I have had to do in our entire relationship. I have shed more tears than I would like to admit and I can guarantee you that I will be drinking a bottle of wine and consuming a pint of ice cream in my sweats tonight once my son is asleep. I mean…I’m totally entitled to at least a couple nights of shamelessly wallowing around in my husband missing sadness, right?

Despite how rough this time apart is sure to be, there is no doubt that we have been blessed with an amazing opportunity, and even in my sadness, I know that the most important emotion to feel right now is gratitude. It is key to remain thankful, and it is key to remember that this distance is only a small period of time in the grand scheme of things. There are sure to be plenty of sad and lonely nights during this time apart, but that’s what Facetime and counting our blessings is for.

In 90 days my husband will return with a ridiculous amount of sales training under his belt, and I will proudly watch him conquer his new territory just as he did the last. In 90 days my husband will be back home, and in 90 days we can officially begin this new and exciting chapter in our life, together.

.5 days down, 89.5 to go…not that I’m counting or anything.

Cheers to changes and opportunity,

The Whine Connoisseur.

When it all began.

Santa Barbara 2016.

Posted on May 2, 2016 by thewhineconnoisseur

I have to admit that up until now, I never truly appreciated Santa Barbara. Our last trip there was a little more than a year ago. It was off season, it was cold, our son was pretty moody the entire time, we stayed pretty close to the hotel, and I never got a true taste of the area. This time was different and I can now say that I completely understand what the Santa Barbara hype is all about.

What’s great about Santa Barbara is that it’s within 40 minutes of every activity we could have ever wished to do as a family. There’s the beach, there’s plenty of diverse food options, there’s hiking, there’s wine tasting, there’s tourist attractions. I’m telling you, we could have had a whole two weeks longer and done something fun/different every day.

We stayed at Hotel Milo, which is right on the beach and is situated on some pretty stunning property. The appeal mostly ends there however and I’m not sure I would actually recommend staying there (although I’m admittedly super picky when it comes to hotels and I’m sure there are plenty of people who would love this spot). If you’re looking for an affordable property close to the water/pier with plenty of food options within walking distance, then it might be the hotel for you.

Our first day in the area, we went for a morning hike at Nojoqui Falls, which is about 30 minutes out of Santa Barbara. Super short hike, easy for kids, beautiful area, nice and secluded. Only downsides were the not so comforting mountain lion warning sign (had us paranoid the entire time) and the fact that there was no waterfall at the end… Not sure if we went at the wrong time of year for it or what, but the hike was beautiful regardless of its missing waterfall. About ten minutes from the trail head is the Main Street area of Solvang, a quaint tourist town that personally felt like it could make an interesting setting for a horror film… A unique town to say the least. We had lunch at a Nordic cafe there, then we ended the day with a swim/mimosas at the hotel pool, which was probably one of the best features of Hotel Milo.

The second day of our trip after my husbands meetings, we went on our first ever wine tasting adventure. The Santa Ynez area is covered with beautiful sprawling vineyards and is only about a 40 minute drive from Santa Barbara. After doing my research to find the most child friendly vineyard options, we ended up at the Zaca Mesa winery. I was feeling a little hesitant to bring my toddler (who regularly enjoys testing his vocal range) to a wine tasting room, but it actually ended up being totally fine. We were told people bring their kids all the time and the tasting room even had a friendly puppy to keep my son entertained. We got to try six wines, bought a bottle of the Sauvignon Blanc, got some beautiful pictures of the vineyard as a rain storm rolled in, and just had an overall really lovely time. It all left me with an itch for more wine tasting and I’m totally mentally planning a trip to Napa.

The third night of our journey was spent in LA at the Hollywood Roosevelt. The epitome of ‘hip’, the hotel’s target audience is certainly not families with young children, but that didn’t stop us from having a good time and taking over the flamingo floaty at the pool.

Traveling with the little dude typically leaves me so exhausted that I need a vacation from my vacation, but this time was overall about as relaxing as you could hope for while traveling with a toddler . As Liam gets older and more familiar with travel, taking him on all kinds of adventures gets undeniably easier, and for that I am so thankful. The entire way home he begged for “hotel, hotel!”, so I think it’s safe to say he enjoyed our travels as much as we did.

Until next time, California.

Cheers,

The Whine Connoisseur

Newport Beach 2016.

Posted on March 23, 2016 by thewhineconnoisseur

At 3 months old, we took our son to Newport Beach for the first time. I was so excited for him to breathe in the ocean air and listen to the sound of the waves at the same beach that I had spent so many summers at as a child. Being a wee little newborn however, he mostly cried the entire time and we packed up and left about 20 minutes into the whole experience. Sadly, our beach ventures have gone pretty much the same way every time since then, with our son either crying, whining, or trying to run away from us the entire time. This time however, was different. Finally old enough to appreciate all that is Newport Beach, the little dude ran around playing in the sand as happy as could be and has even asked to go to the beach several times since we left.

This trip was a major reminder of how blessed we are to travel so regularly as a family. I think I often get overwhelmed by all that goes into traveling with a young child and I forget to stop and simply be thankful for the experience. With the calmness of this trip, my husband and I were mostly able to sit back and watch as our son happily ran around exploring his surroundings. This kid has experienced places and things that I never could have imagined providing my child with, and I am forever thankful for the opportunities that my husbands job has blessed us with.

We stayed at The Island Hotel Newport Beach and just like our last stay there, it was everything we could have wanted. This time we had a corner ocean view/balcony suite, which was perfect for our family and gave us enough space to not drive each other crazy. The hotel has a beautiful pool with an outdoor bar, is a five minute drive from the beach, has some of the sweetest staff members we’ve ever encountered….And don’t even get me started on the delicious patio breakfast at the hotel’s restaurant-Oak Grill (ordering a round of mimosas is a must).

After a couple days of beach going, swimming at the pool, and walking around fashion island (probably a few too many times), we capped off the trip by visiting a few of my sweet family members in the area, who even babysat Liam so that we could end our trip with a baby-free dinner at one of our favorite spots in Irvine (The Lazy Dog). Our time in Newport had a little bit of everything and was certainly one for the books. It’ll be rough topping such a beautiful trip…but you can sure bet we will try!

Cheers,

The Whine Connoisseur

Hello 2k16.

Posted on January 2, 2016 by thewhineconnoisseur

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As we head into 2016, my husband and I have done our share of sentimental banter about the year that we just closed out. Going back through photos, the two of us constantly making remarks like “can you believe that was this year??” And “time went by so fast!”. Ultimately, we decided that this year could be summed up as a year of experiences. We were blessed enough to have traveled to Santa Monica and Mammoth several times along with Beverly Hills/LA, Newport Beach, Venice Beach, Park City, and Saint George/Zion. We became so accustomed to traveling that going just weeks between trips would get us feeling restless and our suitcases became permanent fixtures on our bedroom floor. With each trip we became better at traveling as a family and more importantly, with each trip we were able to provide our son with experiences and memories that create such an exceptionally full childhood for him. The kid is 2.5 years old and has already walked through the falling snow of Park City. He’s breathed in the fresh mountain air of Mammoth and swam around the cold waters of June Lake. He’s chased seagulls along the beaches of the Pacific Ocean and seen the beautiful red cliffs of Zion. My husband has provided us with a year of destinations that have added such richness and beauty to my son’s early childhood, and for that, this year has been unlike any other.

When we weren’t traveling, we found ourselves doing what was probably an over the top amount of hosting. From a backyard brunch, to Liam’s second birthday, to super bowl and Halloween and my husbands birthday and Friendsgiving and New Years and our family Christmas (with plenty of wine nights and margarita days in between) our home certainly held its fair share of events. I’d like to think that between the cooking and cleaning and decorating and planning, I must have polished my hosting skills enough to possibly be considered an up and coming Martha Stuart (but I have no intention of landing myself in prison, sorry Martha).

While all of the traveling is incredible and the hosting makes my heart happy, this coming year our goal is to focus on our growth as a family. My husband and I want to continue the ‘get healthy/fit’ journey that we began in 2015 and plan on returning to a clean diet + meal prepping + P90X come Monday. We want to do more activities centered around our son and his development, such as enrolling him in sports and various classes. We want to train our puppy to become the well behaved security dog that German Shepherds are capable of being. We want to put away a good amount of money into our savings account and make financial decisions that will benefit us in the future. In 2016, our focus is family. Our focus is us. Our focus is growth.

2015 was the year that I finally gained my confidence back after losing 30 pounds of baby weight that I carried around for too long. 2015 was the year my little baby turned two. 2015 was the year my husband and I celebrated two years of marriage. 2015 was the year I continued to learn through experience as both a mother and wife. 2015 was a beautiful year full of blessings and good times. I am thankful to have had the experiences I did and to have shared them with my two favorite people in the whole world. I close the 2015 chapter looking back at it fondly, but also looking forward to what the new year will hold for us. Good things are brewing in our household, we have no doubt. It may be the optimism that comes with the start of a new year talking, but I strongly believe 2016 is going to be a good one.

Wishing you and yours all the best in this coming year.

Cheers,

The Whine Connoisseur.

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A Winter Wonderland: Park City 2k15

Posted on December 17, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

I feel fairly certain that every Christmas song ever written was inspired by the winter wonderland that is Park City. And while that is definitely a very fabricated exaggeration and while I most certainly will not fact check that statement, you get the picture. This was the second December in a row that we have been blessed enough to visit park city during its most magical season and once again, it did not disappoint.

We started off the trip with a plane ride that ended up being far more enjoyable than one would expect when traveling with a toddler. Everything went smoothly (despite leaving the house 30 minutes late), the airport was amazingly accommodating towards travelers with young children, and Liam only had about 2-3 minor fits on the plane, which I deem a major success.

Park City is about a 30 minute drive out of Salt Lake, but the drive is so scenic that it really feels like 10 minutes. A quick stop at a business meeting for my husband, lunch at an awesome BBQ joint, and a few too many tantrums later and we were at our hotel. We chose to stay at the Westgate Park City thanks to our incredibly enjoyable experience there last year. They have a one bedroom villa that is perfect for families, is in prime location for just about anything that one would want to do in the area, plus the balcony view and fire place provide the perfect setting for a vacation full of cozy bundled up evenings.

Our first night there was spent with a lot of middle of the night wake ups. And our second night. And our third night. How is it that somehow a three foot-ish human being can manage to take up 75% of a king sized bed?

Minus the poor sleep however, I would have to say the trip was a great success. My husband had several business meetings in the area that show potential, we ate a ton of delicious food, and went on long drives through the beautiful snowy mountainsides. We drove through neighborhoods full of dreamy homes, walked around with coffee as the snow fell on us, and got to frolic around main street for a while. On our second night there, Liam fell asleep in the car on our way back to the hotel with some take out. My husband somehow managed to quietly ninja walk him back up to the room and put him into bed without him waking, creating the most relaxing of evenings for us. Curled up on the couch in front of the fire watching Elf with pizza, beer, and my husband, all I could think was “man…someone up there REALLY loves us”.

It was the kind of trip that did nothing but remind me of how incredibly blessed we are. There were tantrums and there was not quite enough sleep. My son threw a water glass all over me at a restaurant while it was snowing outside and on a couple of other occasions judgy uptight old people stared us down with the wrath of god in their eyes while we tried to get our two year old to behave. But none of that mattered because I was with my two favorite people in the whole wide world exploring a winter wonderland that looked like something out of a magical fantasy novel or a snowglobe. The pictures do not even do this place justice, so I highly recommend that you all put this place on your travel to-do lists.

There’s nothing to put you in the Christmas spirit quite like a trip to a small snow covered mountain town. With Christmas next week, I go into the holiday feeling blessed blessed blessed and am greatly looking forward to seeing my little man’s excitement on Christmas morning. Wishing all of you and your families a whole lot of loving, smiling, eating, cheersing, relaxing, laughing, and celebrating as Christmas rolls around.

Cheers,

The Whine Connoisseur.

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Thanks.

Posted on November 26, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

To say that the last couple of weeks have been exhausting would be an understatement. Raising a puppy and a toddler at the same time was a much larger task than I had mentally prepared myself for and downtime is currently a thing of the past. I’ve found myself going full blown embarrassing stress attack mode over things such as: the dog playing too aggressively with my sons favorite/irreplaceable stuffed animals… the dog and my son tumbling each other all over my feet as I’m trying to make dinner… the dog biting holes in about 6 pairs of my son’s socks. All should really just be slightly annoying occurrences throughout my day, and yet each one has just…been…GETTING to me. At one point I even turned to my husband and said “I am confident that this is how people go certifiably insane”. Now you’re probably thinking to yourself “dang, this girl is dramatic”. Welp, I would have to agree with you. And yes, I know I signed up for this the moment I decided to bring a puppy into our home. That being said… each incident built up and up and up and my amount of sleep was less and less and less. NOT a good combination to say the least.

As all of this has been going on, I’ve been so caught up in my stress and exhaustion that I have not once sat down and thought about all that I have to actually be thankful for. I live my life by the motto that you will receive back the positivity and good vibes that you send out into the universe. Every day (usually while doing chores) I take about five minutes to simply think about all that I have to be grateful for and thank our higher power for everything I have been blessed with. So, not having done so in a while, there’s nothing like Thanksgiving to bring me back to earth and slap me in the face with a big ol’ serving of grateful pie (does that even make sense?).

I’m thankful to have a roof over my head, but beyond that, to have such a beautiful roof over my head (although the actual roof itself is covered in pigeon poop usually). I’m thankful for a husband who takes care of me and our son in a way that is beyond the wildest dreams that I could have ever envisioned for my future. I’m thankful for my son, his good health, and his loving spirit. I’m thankful for a fridge that is always full of my favorite foods and a pantry that never runs dry. I’m thankful for the many loving family members that we are surrounded by who love us so incredibly selflessly. I’m thankful for Coffee Bean. I’m thankful for tacos. I’m thankful for wine and cheese, of course. I’m thankful for the many ways in which my husband’s job blesses us, from stability to traveling opportunities. I’m thankful for a functioning vehicle. I’m thankful for my education opportunities (even if this semester has been jam packed full of way too many writing assignments). I’m thankful for Bare Minerals and long baths. I’m thankful for our quality group of caring and often incredibly loud friends. I’m thankful for our pup, no matter how many pairs of socks she decides to destroy. I’m thankful for waking up every day, happy and healthy. I’m thankful for the beautiful life that I have been blessed with. Very, very thankful. Today, every day, always.

A very happy Thanksgiving to you all.

Cheers,

The Whine Connoisseur

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Two years down, a lifetime to go.

Posted on October 12, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

I’ll be honest… Its hard to talk about my husband or my marriage without feeling as though I’m either bragging or attempting to write a Nicholas Sparks novel. But today is my anniversary and I have officially been married to my husband for two years, so I think on this occasion I’m entitled to a few paragraphs of shameless boasting.

2 years. 730 days. 24 months. Of long walks in the park talking about the future we are building together. Of date nights at the neighborhood bar when the responsibilities of parenting became temporarily overwhelming. Of traveling to destinations that would house some of our most special memories. Of little tiffs that we would later tease each other about. Of growing into adults that we can be proud of.

In these two years of marriage, I’ve learned that communication is always necessary and is the key to never having an issue escalate to the level of being a fight. I’ve learned that compromise can go a long way and that back rubs can mitigate absolutely any negative energy, always. I’ve learned that typically the best strategy to silencing your husband’s annoying song parodies is to sing along… or better yet, to out annoy him. I’ve learned that the small things can often mean the most and that dreaming together is the most effective way of creating your reality.

Most of all, I’ve learned that marriage is easy if loving each other is your biggest priority. I often find articles popping up on my various forms of social media with headlines like “10 things you could be doing better in your marriage!” or “5 things your spouse really wants you to say!”. But the reality is that there is not a magical list and there are no secrets. If loving each other and treating each other with love and respect is your biggest priority, you will never need a cheesy buzzfeed article to steer you in the right direction.

I know we’ve only been married for two years and haven’t yet earned the title of “Marriage Gurus” but what I can say is that I am pretty darn proud of who we are as a married couple. The man playing so happily with our baby in the bathtub right now is my best friend on the entire planet. He knows exactly how I like my breakfast sandwiches and always lets me steal sips of his water when I forget to bring my own glass up to bed. He can sit by the fire pit with me in our backyard for hours and never run out of things to say. He takes me on date nights regularly and no matter how much he hates Target trips, always lets me drag him there for a quality spending spree. He shares my love for cat/dog videos, interior design, and prohibition era tv series (all two of them…). He believes our home should never go without fresh flowers and he is totally just as partially ocd as I am. He thinks my Italian sass is funny and understands that I take my online shopping hobby very seriously. He is one of the smartest most ambitious people I’ve ever known and he protects his family with the fierceness of a giant pack of well trained german shepherds. He is the prince charming of a man that many believe can only be found in fairy tales.

Today makes two years of marriage, with many more to go. Happy Anniversary to the man that made me believe that love at first sight might really be a thing, that soul mates exist, and a bunch of other cheesy things that Disney movies teach you.

Cheers,

The Whine Connoisseur

Some Fathers Day Words that don’t quite fit into a card.

Posted on June 20, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

They say (whoever they are) that watching your husband be a good father is the most attractive thing he can do. They are not kidding. Not even a little bit.

My son has recently decided that 8am wake ups are simply not early enough, and that 5:30am wake ups would be a little bit more exciting. No matter what time we put him to bed, how long of a nap he had the day prior, or how much energy we allowed him to run off at the park before bed, like an alarm clock… He is up at 5:30 every weekend. The first few times that this happened, I let out a complainy little groan, rolled over, and mentally pleaded with my son to go back to bed. As I did this, my husband (who was easily just as tired as I was) hopped out of bed, grabbed my son, changed his diaper, and brought him into our room to hang out in our bed with us while we tried to fully wake up. My husband did this without me saying a word about it, and I thought to myself ‘oh man that was wonderful. I guess it will be my turn next time’. But then next time came, and again, my husband was the one to jump out of bed without any hesitation or negativity. The following weekend was the same way. And this time all that I could think to myself was ‘this guy that I married is the absolute best’.

My husband has been this way since day one. During my pregnancy he took me to get an Oreo shake each and every time I craved one, spoiled me with gifts, kept me company while I was miserable during bed rest, and he attended every doctors appointment with me. While I was in labor, he rubbed my head and did everything within his power to help (like ask the nurse once every five minutes when the epidural guy would arrive). The day we brought our baby home, you would never know how exhausted he was as he sat there holding our sleeping little Liam, staring at him with overwhelming amounts of pride. During the 5 month long period of multiple middle of the night wake ups, he made sure to help me with at least one wake up a night… Even when he had to be up for work at 7 in the morning. When he comes home from a long day of work and finds out that our son has been testing me all day, he sends me off to go get my nails done or take a bath. When the park is empty and Liam needs a playmate, my husband steps up for the job, chasing him around the park making loud ‘scary’ monster noises while Liam runs away from him squealing with joy. Through the diaper changes, and the endless messes, and the doctor appointments, and the tantrums, and the little baby colds, and learning to walk and talk and eat solid foods, my husband has been there for every single moment of it. Not because i ever once had to ask him to be, but simply because he wanted to be.

My husband is the type of man that every baby deserves as a father, and every women deserves as a husband. He makes mistakes, but does everything in his power to correct those mistakes immediately. Not even a few hours go by in my day in which he is not reminding Liam and I how much he loves us. He works incredibly hard and deals with a ridiculous amount of stress to ensure that Liam and I are taken care of, and he never stops talking about the future that he wants (and I know he will) provide for us. He is really terrible at giving back rubs that last longer than 1.5 minutes and he turns all of the lyrics to my favorite songs into parodies relating to gassy bodily functions. He puts the air in the car on full blast when it’s not even seventy degrees out and he always…and I mean ALWAYS wins the movie picking battle. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. Because at the end of the day, no matter how many very intentional attempts he makes at annoying me, he certainly keeps things amusing while he takes care of his people… Protects his people… Loves his people. And I am so very proud and blessed that my son and I get to be his people.

Happy Father’s Day to a man so great that I feel the desire to write a million braggy blog posts about him. My baby’s daddy, my best friend, my husband.

Cheers,

T.W.C.

When I have kids…

Posted on April 27, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

“When I have kids, they will never throw fits in public”.

“When I have kids they won’t be picky eaters”.

“When I have kids they will be off the pacifier before they turn one”

“When I have kids I’m going to breast feed for at least 9 months”.

When I have kids… When I have kids… When I have kids. We have all said it or thought it AT LEAST a few times prior to poppin em out. But when they’re actually standing there in front of you screaming and throwing their body all around in public because you gave them a yellow tortilla chip instead of a blue one, anything you thought about “when you have kids” just flies out the window. Because the truth is, sometimes your kid is going to throw a fit in public for absolutely no obvious reason, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it. Sometimes your kid is going to refuse to eat the healthy freshly cooked breakfast you set in front of him, but will happily eat the sweet potato cereal puffs that have been sitting in his snack container for a week. Sometimes giving your kid their pacifier when it’s the only thing that will get them to sleep is the best option you’ve got, and sometimes your milk production slows down far before you’d planned it to.

Nothing about parenthood is predictable, but that’s the beauty in it. “When I have this kid, I will love him more than anything in the entire world”… I thought to myself often as I watched my son somersault around in my tummy. But it is impossible to understand or predict how overwhelmingly true that is until your little one is snuggled up next to you in bed saying “mama” as he nestles his head into your neck. Every fit, every tantrum, every ‘hand in the toilet for the third time today’ incident is instantly forgotten with one sweet little smile.

Last week while on vacation in Newport, my husband and I took our son to breakfast. The establishment was full of business folk looking for a little peace and quiet before starting their busy work days. And what a surprise… Our son spent the entire 30 minute meal screaming because he didn’t want the strawberries and potatoes that we got him. We both left in somewhat of a bad mood, only to take him back to the hotel room in which he threw another giant fit because he couldn’t play in the bathroom. Right as I hit my limit, my son started crawling around on the floor uttering the sweetest “meow” sounds I’ve ever heard, pretending to be a kitten. And just like that, I’d forgotten about all of the chaos and all of the times that I had ever been ridiculous enough to think “when I have kids, they will never misbehave in a restaurant”.

The next day, my husband had to tend to business in the area, so I decided to have a day date with my son. I found a Barnes and Nobel near the hotel, got my ice coffee, and took him to the kids section of the store. It all was going great for the five whole minutes leading up to the moment in which my son found a toy that he wanted. I told him “no”, to which he responded “BYE!!!” and took off running towards the elevator with said toy. As I went to chase him, the weight of my purse on the back of the stroller caused it to tip backwards, sending my coffee flying and giving my son just enough time to reach the elevator. I jumped into the elevator and swooped him up just before the doors closed. And yet somehow after all of that, we left the store that day with a stuffed animal in hand, despite the many times in which pre baby me thought “my kids will never get rewarded for bad behavior”. But you know what? After the elevator incident, he cuddled up in my lap for a few sweet moments of book reading…found a stuffed animal he liked… imitated the sound that he thought it made….and then nodded his head yes so very enthusiastically when I asked him if he was going to be a good boy. So yes, I bought my baby that souvenir polar bear stuffed animal (that he thinks is a cat). And what do you know… He was a perfect angel baby for the rest of our day date and that stuffed animal has been his favorite possession ever since.

My point in all of this is that in the parenting world, things don’t always go to plan. Even if you are an over the top organized planning freak like me, shit happens (literally… sometimes your kid is going to poop in their diaper just as you’re walking into dinner). Going against all of the “when I have kids…” that pre parent you ever uttered does not make you a bad parent, it makes you a completely normal parent… A completely normal parent who is learning and evolving…A completely normal parent who is doing your best… A completely normal parent who probably deserves a really long bath, an early bed time, and a pat on the back (or a rub on the back if your significant other is feeling generous).

Cheers,

T.W.C.

Liam and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Twos.

Posted on April 4, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

“Do NOT throw another piece of chicken into my water”, I told my son as I returned to my dinner after rinsing out the chicken that he had thrown into my glass moments earlier. I had spent an hour and a half preparing a lovely feast for my family and after a long day of errands and toddler chasing, all I wanted was to enjoy a warm meal. And yet what do you know… In the split second between setting my water down and picking my fork up… *plop* another piece of grilled chicken sat in my water cup. Normally I might have found this slightly amusing. Maybe even funny. But not at the end of the week I’d just had. You see…my son has hit early onset terrible twos. Dun dun dunnnn.

Funny to think that just a couple of weeks ago, I was writing away about what great behavior my son had been displaying. It was fun while it lasted.

I completely understand why the terrible twos exist. My little man just reached the age in which he is no longer a baby, but still cannot fully express himself the way that he wants to. I’m sure it’s frustrating and for that, I give him as much patience as I can. However that being said… The terrible twos are taking EVERY ounce of patience that I have.

My son’s most recent fits have included riveting displays of drama following me telling him:
-that he could not consume a bottle of hot sauce.
-that I would not put his socks back on after he had pulled them off three times
-not to roll over my toes with his golf club catty
-not to eat lotion
-to stop chewing on DVD cases
-And of course… me telling him it’s nap time.

His fits last for anywhere from one minute to twenty minutes or so, and his favorite place to throw them of course is in the middle of large public settings. The fits include him dramatically throwing himself to the floor, some sort of fake crying/screaming combo, attempts at hitting the adult responsible for ruining his fun, and my personal favorite… Running off towards the laundry room, slamming the door, and pouting in the corner between the washing machine and the wall.

So what is a parent to do? My only answer… The best we can. Just like the ‘waking up every two hours’ phase and the ‘spit up on 6 outfits a day’ phase and the ‘I’m going to suddenly start waking up three times a night despite the fact that I’ve been sleeping through the night for a year now’ phase, this too is just that… a PHASE. He might test my patience and I might still have a bruise on my forehead from the fit fueled head butting that took place last week, but at the end of the day, he is a toddler. He is growing both mentally and physically. He is frustrated. He is testing boundaries and learning what he can and cannot do in this world. It is my job to guide him into understanding right from wrong. It is my job to teach him manners and to teach him to communicate what he wants in the best way that he can. But most of all it is my job to love him. Through every fit, through every tantrum, through every melt down, the best I can do is show him love. Show him understanding. Show him patience. Even if that means collapsing into my bed at 8pm due to the pure exhaustion that all that patience has brought on.

I have to look back at the pre baby me and laugh at the fact that I once told myself that ‘one day when I had children’, the terrible twos would not phase me because I was a two year old pre-school teacher with enough experience to tame any unruly child. HA! The truth is, no amount of experience will prepare you for the day your child throws an Oscar award winning level of fit in the middle of a small restaurant at ten in the morning. No amount of experience will prepare you for the first time your child violently throws a cup at you because you told him he had to finish his lunch before he could play in the backyard. And no amount of experience will prepare you for the feeling in your heart when at the end of a horrendous tantrum, your toddler walks up to you, wraps both little hands around your neck, and gives you a big fat slobbery kiss. Nothing can prepare you for parenting…No amount of experience or reading or advice. Parenting is simply about taking it one day at a time..one tantrum at a time.. One hug at a time..doing whatever feels right, and hoping and praying that you’re doing a good job of it.

Earning my title of Whine Connoisseur one early onset terrible twos tantrum at a time!

Cheers,

T.W.C.

PS: Now accepting all offers to babysit my son 🙂