Keeping up with the toddler.

Posted on June 5, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

A few days ago I found myself collapsed onto the couch. It wasn’t even 10pm yet, but there I was, completely exhausted as if I had been running a marathon all day. I temporarily had a hypochondriac moment in which I thought that the only logical reason for me to feel this way was because I must be dying, but once the drama subsided, I realized that my exhaustion was completely understandable. From 7am until 8pm every single day I am chasing around a toddler who thinks that crushing his cheddar bunnies into the carpet with his construction truck is the coolest thing ever. I clean up an average of 32 messes a day, cook multiple meals, tame more tantrums than I can count, change a ridiculous amount of stinky diapers (like really, how does a 30 pound kid poop so much?), work out, and so on. Even sitting down to pee for 30 seconds becomes a task as my son pulls up a stool to the sink and begins splashing water across the bathroom. Toddlers are busy, unruly creatures, and keeping up with them is an adventure every moment of every day. An often financially tolling adventure…

This leads me to the kaboom incident. Right off the bat, you know any story that involves a toddler and a bottle of kaboom is never going to end well. Thank sweet baby Jesus no toddlers were harmed in the making of this story. The carpet however, was. The dishes had been building up in our sink for at least 24 hours and the time had come for me to tackle them. My son, being the sneaky little sneak that he is, seized the opportunity to run upstairs into my bedroom. This happens often, and I thought nothing of it, thinking that I would simply go pull him out of my bed once I finished the last couple of dishes. But my bed is not where I found the toddler just a few moments later. Instead I found him hiding behind his teepee with a bottle of kaboom. You see, a few hours prior, my husband had been in the bathroom doing some cleaning, like the awesome husband that he is. Not so awesome is that the kaboom was accidentally left on the counter just high enough that to any normal child it may not have been accessible, but to my long-armed-will-stop-at-nothing-toddler, the kaboom was indeed reachable. I grabbed it away from him, feeling incredibly thankful that he hadn’t decided to stick it in his mouth, and feeling proud that my all knowing mommy senses had told me to go check on him sooner than I’d planned. He couldn’t have had the bottle in his possession for longer than 30 seconds, so I simply did a quick look around, and decided that there was no way he could have even had the opportunity to spray it anywhere. The funny thing about kaboom is that it is clear when it is sprayed… And it most certainly is not clear when it dries. The next day, my husband and I walked into my sons room only to discover that a section of his carpet had been permanently turned purple. So that’s that. The kaboom will forever more be out of reach, and our carpet is purple.

On the subject of carpet, there was also a couple of weeks ago when my son grabbed the bottle of honey that I’d just purchased and decided to paint the carpet with it. The entire week prior, he’d had a cute fascination with the bear shaped bottle. He would walk up to it in the pantry and give its little bear face a smooch on the nose, then run away squealing. So, as I stood two feet away from him watching this adorable little routine, I very wrongly assumed that this time would end the same way. But surprise surprise, he grabbed the bottle and took off running. As he made his escape, he had managed to open the top, and drizzle out honey as he went. It was so ridiculous that it was honestly amusing. Although I’m probably only Saying that because the honey came out of the carpet surprisingly easily.

But the chaos has not been limited to the carpets. There’s also the tragic tale of the death of our new cactus. It was nine in the morning and my son had been ‘on one’ already. Needing some relief, I took him outside with the hopes of resetting him. Not even thirty seconds later, he somehow had managed to knock over a fold up table into a shelf, catapulting our new potted cactus onto the outdoor rug. Sad baby cactus flipped upside down, and in the process of trying to pick it up, a little prickly cactus part got lodged in my finger. Broken pot. Massive quantities of soil everywhere. Laughing toddler. Frustrated and temporarily injured mommy.

Keeping up with our toddler has been interesting to say the least. In the last two weeks, we have dealt with the kaboom incident, the honey incident, the cactus incident, a repulsive first time poop in the bathtub incident, a hands in the toilet incident, several tantrums in the middle of the grocery store incidents, the blackberry smearing all over the outdoor furniture incident, and probably a hundred other incidents that I’ve blocked from my memory in an attempt to keep a small fraction of my sanity. In each of these incidents there have certainly been moments of frustration, but the frustration quickly passes as I am reminded that he is just a little guy trying to learn about the world around him and just do his thang.

That same little boy who was wiping chicken nugget crumbs all over the couch just a few hours ago is the same little boy who sat perfectly quiet and well behaved during his first haircut this evening. That same little boy who thinks that somehow his hands need to end up inside of the toilet every time he practices going potty is the same little boy who is growing up and quickly approaching his second birthday right before my eyes. That same little boy who throws a tantrum every time I tell him not to eat dirt is the same little boy that cuddles into my arms and gives me little kisses every night before bed.

Keeping up with a toddler is exhausting, but it is the most rewarding exhaustion I have ever experienced. So tonight I close my eyes knowing that I will most likely wake up exhausted tomorrow, and I will most likely go to sleep exhausted tomorrow, but it will all be worth it, just the same as it was today.

Cheers,

T.W.C.

A letter to my pre motherhood self.

Posted on May 10, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

Dear pre-mommy me,

A short time from now, you are going to be blessed with the craziest ball of energy you’ve ever seen. He will look just like you and act just like his daddy. He will say no to absolutely everything (even when he means yes). He will throw entire bowls of food on the ground and laugh in your face as you tell him to pick it up. He will cover your white coffee table in dark baby cub paw prints… Five minutes after you’ve cleaned it. He will roll around the dirt in the backyard at least twice a day (and usually try to snack on it as well). He will deny the plate of dinner you set in front of him 5 out of 7 days of the week. He will test your patience. He will make you question yourself and your parenting abilities. But more than any of that, he will make you a better person. He will give you the title of mommy, and you will wear that title with pride.

Because pride is the feeling in your heart when you look into the innocent eyes of the little human being that you created. Pride is the feeling in your heart when your little human shouts an enthusiastic “HI!!” to the sad stranger walking by and manages to make that stranger genuinely smile. Pride is the feeling in your heart when your little human figures out a new word or follows a new direction.

I will not lie, motherhood is just as scary as you’re expecting it to be. You’re faced with decision after decision and you won’t know if you’ve made the right decision until after the choice has been made. You will make mistakes, but there is no mother who hasn’t. You will do your best, and at the end of the day, that is what your son will see.

Rest up, for motherhood is exhausting, and like a guard dog, you will never truly sleep. But for every night of 2am wakes up, there is a morning of sweet snuggles. For every tantrum in the middle of the grocery store, there is a playful dance in the middle of the living room. For every time that you look in the mirror and miss your old body, there is a happy little boy running around as reminder that the changes were worth it. For every doubt you have, there is a sweet little hug as confirmation that maybe you really are doing it right.

During the quest to be a better parent, Google will be your best friend and your worst enemy. So will social media. You will find yourself constantly comparing yourself to other mothers, forgetting that your life does not need to look like anyone else’s. You will struggle to allow your little one to leave the protection of the safety bubble that you’ve created for him (even if it’s just playing on the jungle gym with another toddler). As cliche as it may sound, follow your heart. Follow your mother instincts. They will always point you in the right direction.

Of all the titles you can have in this world, mommy is certainly one of the best. I know that at this time, the only thing scarier than the idea of giving birth is the fear of being a bad parent. But fear not, for epidurals are a gift from the heavens and the happiness that motherhood fills you with will forever outweigh any worries you may have.

I guess all of this can really be summed up with this: motherhood is awesome (even if it doesn’t feel that way in the midst of a restaurant tantrum). Don’t be afraid, be excited. For there is a little boy who is about to REALLY make life interesting.

Cheers,

T.W.C.

When I have kids…

Posted on April 27, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

“When I have kids, they will never throw fits in public”.

“When I have kids they won’t be picky eaters”.

“When I have kids they will be off the pacifier before they turn one”

“When I have kids I’m going to breast feed for at least 9 months”.

When I have kids… When I have kids… When I have kids. We have all said it or thought it AT LEAST a few times prior to poppin em out. But when they’re actually standing there in front of you screaming and throwing their body all around in public because you gave them a yellow tortilla chip instead of a blue one, anything you thought about “when you have kids” just flies out the window. Because the truth is, sometimes your kid is going to throw a fit in public for absolutely no obvious reason, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it. Sometimes your kid is going to refuse to eat the healthy freshly cooked breakfast you set in front of him, but will happily eat the sweet potato cereal puffs that have been sitting in his snack container for a week. Sometimes giving your kid their pacifier when it’s the only thing that will get them to sleep is the best option you’ve got, and sometimes your milk production slows down far before you’d planned it to.

Nothing about parenthood is predictable, but that’s the beauty in it. “When I have this kid, I will love him more than anything in the entire world”… I thought to myself often as I watched my son somersault around in my tummy. But it is impossible to understand or predict how overwhelmingly true that is until your little one is snuggled up next to you in bed saying “mama” as he nestles his head into your neck. Every fit, every tantrum, every ‘hand in the toilet for the third time today’ incident is instantly forgotten with one sweet little smile.

Last week while on vacation in Newport, my husband and I took our son to breakfast. The establishment was full of business folk looking for a little peace and quiet before starting their busy work days. And what a surprise… Our son spent the entire 30 minute meal screaming because he didn’t want the strawberries and potatoes that we got him. We both left in somewhat of a bad mood, only to take him back to the hotel room in which he threw another giant fit because he couldn’t play in the bathroom. Right as I hit my limit, my son started crawling around on the floor uttering the sweetest “meow” sounds I’ve ever heard, pretending to be a kitten. And just like that, I’d forgotten about all of the chaos and all of the times that I had ever been ridiculous enough to think “when I have kids, they will never misbehave in a restaurant”.

The next day, my husband had to tend to business in the area, so I decided to have a day date with my son. I found a Barnes and Nobel near the hotel, got my ice coffee, and took him to the kids section of the store. It all was going great for the five whole minutes leading up to the moment in which my son found a toy that he wanted. I told him “no”, to which he responded “BYE!!!” and took off running towards the elevator with said toy. As I went to chase him, the weight of my purse on the back of the stroller caused it to tip backwards, sending my coffee flying and giving my son just enough time to reach the elevator. I jumped into the elevator and swooped him up just before the doors closed. And yet somehow after all of that, we left the store that day with a stuffed animal in hand, despite the many times in which pre baby me thought “my kids will never get rewarded for bad behavior”. But you know what? After the elevator incident, he cuddled up in my lap for a few sweet moments of book reading…found a stuffed animal he liked… imitated the sound that he thought it made….and then nodded his head yes so very enthusiastically when I asked him if he was going to be a good boy. So yes, I bought my baby that souvenir polar bear stuffed animal (that he thinks is a cat). And what do you know… He was a perfect angel baby for the rest of our day date and that stuffed animal has been his favorite possession ever since.

My point in all of this is that in the parenting world, things don’t always go to plan. Even if you are an over the top organized planning freak like me, shit happens (literally… sometimes your kid is going to poop in their diaper just as you’re walking into dinner). Going against all of the “when I have kids…” that pre parent you ever uttered does not make you a bad parent, it makes you a completely normal parent… A completely normal parent who is learning and evolving…A completely normal parent who is doing your best… A completely normal parent who probably deserves a really long bath, an early bed time, and a pat on the back (or a rub on the back if your significant other is feeling generous).

Cheers,

T.W.C.

Liam and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Twos.

Posted on April 4, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

“Do NOT throw another piece of chicken into my water”, I told my son as I returned to my dinner after rinsing out the chicken that he had thrown into my glass moments earlier. I had spent an hour and a half preparing a lovely feast for my family and after a long day of errands and toddler chasing, all I wanted was to enjoy a warm meal. And yet what do you know… In the split second between setting my water down and picking my fork up… *plop* another piece of grilled chicken sat in my water cup. Normally I might have found this slightly amusing. Maybe even funny. But not at the end of the week I’d just had. You see…my son has hit early onset terrible twos. Dun dun dunnnn.

Funny to think that just a couple of weeks ago, I was writing away about what great behavior my son had been displaying. It was fun while it lasted.

I completely understand why the terrible twos exist. My little man just reached the age in which he is no longer a baby, but still cannot fully express himself the way that he wants to. I’m sure it’s frustrating and for that, I give him as much patience as I can. However that being said… The terrible twos are taking EVERY ounce of patience that I have.

My son’s most recent fits have included riveting displays of drama following me telling him:
-that he could not consume a bottle of hot sauce.
-that I would not put his socks back on after he had pulled them off three times
-not to roll over my toes with his golf club catty
-not to eat lotion
-to stop chewing on DVD cases
-And of course… me telling him it’s nap time.

His fits last for anywhere from one minute to twenty minutes or so, and his favorite place to throw them of course is in the middle of large public settings. The fits include him dramatically throwing himself to the floor, some sort of fake crying/screaming combo, attempts at hitting the adult responsible for ruining his fun, and my personal favorite… Running off towards the laundry room, slamming the door, and pouting in the corner between the washing machine and the wall.

So what is a parent to do? My only answer… The best we can. Just like the ‘waking up every two hours’ phase and the ‘spit up on 6 outfits a day’ phase and the ‘I’m going to suddenly start waking up three times a night despite the fact that I’ve been sleeping through the night for a year now’ phase, this too is just that… a PHASE. He might test my patience and I might still have a bruise on my forehead from the fit fueled head butting that took place last week, but at the end of the day, he is a toddler. He is growing both mentally and physically. He is frustrated. He is testing boundaries and learning what he can and cannot do in this world. It is my job to guide him into understanding right from wrong. It is my job to teach him manners and to teach him to communicate what he wants in the best way that he can. But most of all it is my job to love him. Through every fit, through every tantrum, through every melt down, the best I can do is show him love. Show him understanding. Show him patience. Even if that means collapsing into my bed at 8pm due to the pure exhaustion that all that patience has brought on.

I have to look back at the pre baby me and laugh at the fact that I once told myself that ‘one day when I had children’, the terrible twos would not phase me because I was a two year old pre-school teacher with enough experience to tame any unruly child. HA! The truth is, no amount of experience will prepare you for the day your child throws an Oscar award winning level of fit in the middle of a small restaurant at ten in the morning. No amount of experience will prepare you for the first time your child violently throws a cup at you because you told him he had to finish his lunch before he could play in the backyard. And no amount of experience will prepare you for the feeling in your heart when at the end of a horrendous tantrum, your toddler walks up to you, wraps both little hands around your neck, and gives you a big fat slobbery kiss. Nothing can prepare you for parenting…No amount of experience or reading or advice. Parenting is simply about taking it one day at a time..one tantrum at a time.. One hug at a time..doing whatever feels right, and hoping and praying that you’re doing a good job of it.

Earning my title of Whine Connoisseur one early onset terrible twos tantrum at a time!

Cheers,

T.W.C.

PS: Now accepting all offers to babysit my son 🙂

03.17.2015

Posted on March 17, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

I remember when my son hit the ‘how many toes can I fit in my mouth at one time’ stage, thinking to myself, “man, I don’t know if he can get any cooler than this’. Then when he hit the ‘gotta test my vocal range’ stage, I remember recording video after video and thinking to myself “man, NOW I don’t know if he could get any cooler than this”. Then he hit the walking stage and somehow managed to get even cooler. Now he’s in the ‘let me say bye to every person that walks past me ever’ and the ‘let me show everyone that wants to interact with me where their bellybutton is’ stage and oh my goodness I truly don’t know if this kid can get any cooler.

Liam was not the easiest baby. With a curiosity often too much for his own good, he became easily frustrated at the fact that he was unable to physically do the things that his mind wanted to do, and this frustration caused fit upon fit upon fit. It was frustrating to watch him be so frustrated, but at last, I think he has finally reached a stage where not only is his body capable of doing what his mind wants it to do, but more than that, he is more cognitively aware of what he is actually capable of doing.

Of course, my favorite new ‘Liam trick’ is his ability to show that he completely understands what I’m saying to him and to follow directions. “Lets go upstairs to change your diaper” I say… and he takes off running to his diaper changing table. “Lets put your shoes on to go outside” I say… and he goes to the closet, says “go, go”, grabs his shoes, and waits on the steps for me to help put them on. “Lets take a bath” I say… and he frolics towards the bathroom saying “ba! ba!” (which sounds a lot more like bath when you hear it in person). I feel as though each day I discover a new direction that he understands and a new word that he can pronounce. We’ve hit a major learning milestone and this kid is charging full speed ahead.

As my son’s various skills, tricks, and developments gain speed, so does everything else in our lives. My husband has been on back to back business trips, winning over one hotel at a time with his undeniably contagious smile and smooth mannerisms. Last week he successfully finished the first half of realty school, meaning that after just eight more weeks and the passing of his licensing test, I will officially be married to a Real Estate agent//linen and terry salesman. A random combination, yes… but this wife couldn’t be any more proud!

My husband and I continue to work hard towards living the healthy lifestyle that we promised ourselves at the beginning of this year. Down nearly 40 pounds between the two of us, we continue to push on. With the combination of P90X and a workout routine that I put together myself (we call it the only logical title… Bailie’s Assercize), we are pool ready and feeling confident. For the first time since gaining my pregnancy weight, I am happy to look in the mirror. I am happy to get dressed for the day. I am happy to go try on new clothes. I am happy with myself, and man does it feel great. I cannot obnoxiously preach enough about the importance of living a healthy life style. It takes less time to throw together a shake with some almond milk, bananas, peanut butter, and protein powder, than it does to get in the car and drive down the street to taco bell. It costs less money to scramble some eggs with some sauteed peppers than it does to buy a breakfast combo from Mcdonalds every day. Minor changes can lead to huge improvements. It’s just a matter of taking that first step and having the motivation and discipline that it takes to follow through. Not only will you be happy to have a ‘hot bod’ for pool season, but you’ll be even happier when you are capable of frolicking around at 70 years old telling everybody that “70 is the new 30”.

In other news, my husband and I have developed an unhealthy Game of Thrones obsession. I’m not kidding… we are obsessed in every form of the definition. We blew through the first three seasons in about 3.5 weeks and the only thing stopping us from blowing through season 4 is that Amazon seems to be taking its time to deliver it. It is March and we have already planned our entire family’s Halloween costumes around the series, and I don’t think I’ve been able to have a single conversation in which a Game of Thrones reference is not made. We haven’t even started the new House of Cards season because we do not care about a single other show on the planet at the moment. And I’m not even embarrassed. It’s THAT good.

So life continues on (although it may end when Game of Thrones does). Busy has become the new normal in our household, and while it can sometimes feel chaotic, it is a happy kind of chaos. My baby is full of new developments, my husband is handsome and highly motivated, and I… I have not one complaint about life. Other than the fact that Game of Thrones season 4 needs to be in my mailbox like, yesterday. We stocked up our wine rack last weekend, I made a super successful Trader Joes run this morning, my son finally sees the enjoyment in cuddling up on the couch, and my husband returns from a business trip tomorrow. Life is good, and that’s all there is to it.

Cheers,

T.W.C.

02.24.15: A february update.

Posted on February 25, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

I should probably change my blog’s description to “occasional blogger”, since clearly blogging consistency is just not my thing. It’s not that I haven’t tried, really. It’s just that this afternoon my son woke up literally the SECOND I sat down to work on this post. Yesterday my small amount of ‘free time’ (if that’s what you would call it) was taken up doing the backed up dirty dishes in the sink and being taught by my sweet but very bossy Italian grandpa how to ‘properly’ cook chicken. The day before that was meal prep day and the day before that was errand running day and the day before that was pretend you didn’t wait until last minute to do all of your homework day and the day before that I told myself I would write this blog post no matter what… until my son decided he should dive all over my laptop… and the day before that we were on a last minute business trip in Santa Barbara. You get the gist. As much as I would love to sit down and provide updates and stories and recipe ideas and advice and all of the other fun and adorable things that super mom bloggers write about… I just have not had the time, and probably will continue to not have the time until this semester of school comes to an end.

So here we are, several long weeks since my last post. Our time has been spent partly trying not to think about the hamburgers that we could be eating instead of the turkey vegetable patties that we are actually eating. We continue to work out 6 days a week (mostly) and as exhausting as it has been, we have found much success with the p90x3 workout routine. Now personally down 12 pounds, and my husband down another 15 or so, we are finally seeing the progress that felt so far away just two short months ago. Adding green tea to our nightly routine has seemed to make a big difference in our fat burning ability and getting to bed at an earlier hour has made an incredible difference both mentally and physically. I have picked up a love and appreciation for essential oils, and although I am still stumbling my away around which oil to use for what, at least the oil diffuser makes our house smell pretty freaking good in the meantime. Keeping our goals in mind, we are pushing along. Between the focus on our healthy lifestyle and our focus on both finishing up school, we are left with very limited free time. My husband is just one class away from taking his real estate licensing exam and all that we seem to be able to think about are the exciting new adventures on the horizon. All I can say is that there are two well deserved (probably low calorie) drinks with our names on them once pool season is upon us!

In more interesting news, my son has recently added moon and night night to his vocabulary, while also getting a little bit better at not calling everything on his face an eye. He has gotten surprisingly good at following directions (when he wants to) and has figured out how to open the fridge and bring us the apple juice container when he’s thirsty. This kid has a love for the outdoors like I have never seen before, and I couldn’t be more grateful to have a backyard for him to frolic around in. Other than throwing our backyard rocks down the garbage disposal and crunching leaves all over the freshly swept patio, Liam’s favorite new past times have included dancing the most adorable of dances to any and all types of music, along with with a love for all things with four wheels. He points at airplanes and says “oooooooh!” and he can down a bowl of mac n cheese as though he’s in a food eating competition. We gave the potty a try the other day, but he thought that big porcelain bowl of water was the scariest thing he ever had to sit on… so we probably won’t be trying that again for a while.

As we enter this weekend, I look forward to my upcoming birthday celebration. I honestly could not tell you the last time that I had a night out with my friends and I am looking forward to it so very much. My blessing of a grandma is taking Liam for the night so that my husband and I can join our friends for a night of good food, good drinks, and good times. The reservations are set, my outfit has been picked, plans for the taxi that we will inevitably need have been made, and my nail appointment has been scheduled. All that comes between me and my celebration of 23 years of life is a few long week days, probably several rounds of dishes, a couple of homework assignments, and some dreaded workouts. But hey, it will make the days go by quicker… maybe? Kind of? Sort of? Probably not, but one can hope! In the meantime I will continue to fantasize about the cheat donut that I am going to consume the second I wake up on Saturday.

I’ve held my son hostage in his high chair for a few minutes too long now, and the second his strawberries are gone, I know the protesting will begin. With that, I will wrap this up and return to my mom duties/master chef dinner preparing duties with the pride of a blog post finally done!

Cheers,

T.W.C.

01.28.15

Posted on January 28, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

“Sweet Caroline! Dun dun dun. Good times never seemed so good!”. At that point my mom would shout “so good! So good!” as she threw her arms in the air, imitating what happened when the song played live in concert. She did the same thing every.single.time. it came on (Which I might add, was about four times a week thanks to the mix cd that she insisted I make her). To this day, I can’t help but to think of her each time I hear it. The first few years after her death, the song was a trigger for instant tears. However, with the 6 year anniversary of her death upon us, the song finally brings me the same amount of nostalgic joy that it once brought her.

My mom was a beautiful person. She was a hopeful romantic and she was a dreamer. She once wrote on a very official debate tournament semi finals ballot that her reason for voting the way she did was because the winning team ‘had more spunk’ than the opposing team. She would drive 10 laps around a parking lot if that’s what it took to get a prime parking spot, and her broccoli cheddar soup would put Panera bread to shame. She was not perfect, but she found so much joy in the silliest things, and I know she would have been the most loving grandma to my son.

She was never able to meet the love of my life, and she was never able to meet my baby boy. For that, there will always be some sadness. But I can feel her in our lives each and every day. When my son points to her photos, and when I turn the car radio on to one of her favorite songs, she is there. When I am scared or nervous or lost, I remember the silly pieces of advice she would give me, and she is there. When I snuggle up with one of her throw blankets or a family member shares (an always hilariously ridiculous) story about her, she is there. The fact that my mom will never have the chance to hold my son or to hug my husband is a fact I had to face long ago. But she is there in spirit and memory each and every time that I need her to be, and that is enough.

So on this sad day, I am going to choose to be thankful for the precious years I had with her. I am going to be thankful for the love that she put in my heart and the lessons that she taught me both before and after her death. I am thankful for the fond memories that I can share with my husband and son, and I am thankful for the truly amazing family members that have been there for me in the moments that she couldn’t be.

Six years ago today, the party in heaven got a little bit crazier. With terrible dance moves, rum/diet coke in hand, and surely wearing a hot pink sparkly dress, my mom made her heaven debut, and the world lost a special woman too soon. Flip flops in paradise, rest in peace mama.

Cheers,

T.W.C.

Taking California. Again.

Posted on January 27, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

Going on a family trip to Southern California may not have been the best thing for my diet, and it certainly was not the best thing for my workout schedule, but it was great for my soul, so it all balances out, right?

Going into this trip, I felt like I needed to get out of Las Vegas… like, yesterday. I am not a winter person. At all. I enjoy the winter months from Thanksgiving until New Years, and as soon as those winter events have come to an end, my brain moves into summer mode. So in other words, this trip came at a much needed time. Between a memorial service for my great grandma in San Clemente, and my husband needing to take care of some business in Santa Monica, this trip just fell into place perfectly.

We spent the first portion of our trip at the Ocean View hotel in Santa Monica. Directly across from the beautiful beach/Santa Monica Pier, and right up the street from the Third Street Promenade, we couldn’t have asked for a more prime location. I have seen master bathrooms larger than our hotel room and the walls were so thin that it sounded as though each passing hotel guest was standing in our room… but when you can open your balcony doors to the smells and sounds of the ocean, you are quickly reminded that there really isn’t much to complain about.

When my husband tended to business and meetings during the day, I took my son on long walks on the Santa Monica bluffs over looking the ocean. When my husband was done working, we strolled through some of the most stunning beach neighborhoods that I have ever laid eyes on, we spent time on the beach as the sun set, and we went to some of the most delicious restaurants in the area. We did have a breakfast incident in which Liam threw his sippy cup at my coffee cup, sending coffee all across the table and into my lap… But hey, after the mess was all cleaned up my avocado/mushroom/goat cheese omelet was so great that it was impossible to care too much.

As beautiful as Santa Monica was, after several awful nights of sleep due to Liam waking up from all of the noises outside, the second half of our trip was welcomed with open arms. Moving on to stay with my god mother in Irvine, our family fell nothing short of being totally and completely spoiled. Upon arriving in Irvine, my husband and I were hitting our parenting limit. Liam had been great for most of the trip, but after the bad nights of sleep and a terrible experience with him (involving 10 too many hysterical fits) at a restaurant that day, we were in great need of a break. Little did we know, my real life fairy god mother and her dear husband had already planned on babysitting Liam for the night so that we could go out to an ‘adult’ dinner. Who knew how relieving a two hour dinner could be! We found a lovely restaurant down the street, shared some delicious sangria, then came back to a sleeping baby and the good company of my amazing God mother and her family.

The following day, we attended a lovely memorial service for my great grandma in San Clemente. At my cousin Kelly’s beautiful home overlooking the ocean, the family came together to remember our great Gammy and to celebrate the long life she lived. Liam found joy in chasing a bunch of the little girls around the house, while simultaneously draining my husband and I of the small amount of energy that we had left.

Returning to Irvine that night, my god mother had one more grand surprise up her sleeve: a hot tub date for my husband and I in her backyard. Not only did she create the loveliest ambiance of candles and light fixtures surrounding the hot tub, but she also put Liam to bed AND treated us like royalty, bringing us drinks and Liam updates as we enjoyed the peace of the perfect California night.

Heading home on Sunday morning, we were feeling relaxed, thankful, loved, and pretty freakin stoked about the lack of traffic. Our trip was everything we needed it to be. We got to relax, my husband was able to secure some important meetings, we were able to spend quality time with our loved ones, and Liam was better behaved than we’ve ever seen him be on a trip. The year has been off to an interesting start to say the least and it has already presented its fair share of challenges. However, sitting in the comfort of our home, relaxed and refreshed, I can’t help but to feel as though we are one very blessed family.

Cheers,

T.W.C.

Mission Get Hot: week two.

Posted on January 14, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

Our journey started almost two weeks ago. I am down 4 pounds, 2 inches, and can already see a major change (as in I finally don’t look 5 months pregnant before I go to bed each night). That being said… All I have been wanting is a cheeseburger.

Week one was the easy week. Feeling pumped and excited, I whipped out new recipes left and right and looked forward to working out each day. Going into this week however, I had a temporary crash. Sunday evening, after 10 days straight of workouts and home cooking every single meal, I found myself completely worn out. I did not want to cook. I did not want to meal prep. I did not want to drink another fruit smoothie or even look at another piece of broccoli. I did not want to move a single limb in my body. I just wanted to sit on the couch gorging myself on hamburgers and pizza for the rest of eternity.

That’s where my husband comes in. As I sat there obnoxiously wallowing in my hamburger fantasies, my husband reminded me of all of my success so far. He told me he would make me a healthy meal so that I didn’t have to cook yet another one. He told me my feelings were completely normal and understandable at this point in our journey, but he also told me that I could not let those feelings consume me. In other words, my husband was a saint.

Eventually, after lots of pep talk and hugs, I got past my hour of weakness. I woke up on Monday feeling ready to face another week of hard work, and feeling grateful for the community of support I have on this mission. While I wasn’t proud of my moment of weakness, I can also pat myself on the back knowing that I made it through the first one, when just a few weeks ago I would have caved.

Steel cut oats, berries, grapefruit, eggs, pistachios, broccoli, kale, salmon, and brown rice have taken the place of fast food, cheeseburgers, French fries, pizza, and beer. I have found an array of Pinterest recipes that creatively allow me to sneak in the not so tasty nutrients that my body needs and I have made it a priority to read up on nutrition facts and to become more familiar with the foods that I am putting into my body. With each day of workouts I have found that I am becoming stronger and stronger, and each time I look in the mirror I am becoming happier and more confident.

Just 2 weeks down, and 10 more to go, I am sure I will continue to have moments of weakness. I’m sure my husband will have moments of weakness. But in those moments, we have each other and the vision of our healthy and fit future.

And with that, the journey continues on.

Cheers,

T.W.C.

wild Alaskan salmon marinated in Trader Joe’s Soyaki sauce, brown rice, green onion, and broccoli

Crustless quiche made with eggs, almond milk, spinach, red bell pepper, onion, and thin layer of mozzarella cheese.

stovetop popcorn made with organic popcorn kernels and coconut oil

Meal prep: broccoli, brown rice with green onions and pepper, ground turkey patties made with organic ground turkey, green onion, spinach, yellow onion, red pepper flakes, and oregano.

blackened organic chicken breast, yellow squash, zucchini, and steamed green beans.

Chicken tacos made with: corn tortillas, low fat Mexican cheese blend, cilantro, onions, organic chicken (seasoned with garlic powder, onion powder, pepper, chilli powder, and cayenne pepper), homemade guacamole, homemade chipotle sauce

grapefruit with a smoothie containing: frozen strawberries, frozen blueberries, strawberry greek yogurt, banana, oats, and orange juice.

Mission: get hot.

Posted on January 6, 2015 by thewhineconnoisseur

The new year is upon us and this slacker mommy is finally back to blogging. While my blog took a back seat in the farthest row possible during the holiday season, I now welcome it and the new year with open arms.

I have never been a ‘new years resolution’ type of girl. Always taking the pessimistic route, when asked what my resolution was for the year, I would come up with a sassy answer along the lines of ‘to not eat any shellfish’ (I am allergic to shellfish and hate the stuff anyways). I approached the entire thing wrong, thinking that if I set no goal for myself, I couldn’t disappoint myself when I couldn’t accomplish said goal. This year however, inspired by my husband’s incredible ability to achieve his wildest goals, I set myself a goal. To put it at it’s simplest: get healthy, fit, and well… get hot.

I went into pregnancy weighing 107 and wearing a size 0 or 2, but I was by no means healthy. I ate McDonald’s once a week, drank a dr pepper once a day, and couldn’t even tell you what the last fruit I ate was. Since having my son, I have drastically modified my ways, however I still have not been consuming in a way that any nutritionist would approve of. I have lost very little of my birth weight and every poor food choice I make seems to haunt my remaining little baby pooch for weeks to come. Wasting money on poor food choices and fattening alcoholic beverages has led to very minimal baby weight loss, which in turn has led to a very low confidence. In the 19 months since birthing my son, I have done several juice cleanses and diet modifications, however I have not fully committed to any of them. My exercise routine consisted of a few squats and push ups every 3 or 4 days, if at all… And I wondered why I wasn’t losing any of the baby weight? I was living a lifestyle that was simply not sustainable long term for my health or for my bank account. It took talk of New Years resolutions, Instagram creeping some super hot fitness models, and several conversations with my husband and close friends to realize that now is the time for some big change.

In the least overdone and cliche way possible, I mean it when I say that 2015 is our year. My husband and I are committed to not only getting the ‘hot bods’ we’ve always wanted, but we are also committed to living a healthier lifestyle. Knowing that I will be on bed rest for the entire duration of my next pregnancy, I have always said that I cannot get pregnant with baby #2 until I have lost all of my previous baby weight. Getting pregnant before I have achieved that goal would most likely cause me to gain so much weight that I fear I may never be able to come back from it. With that being said, I am not only losing this weight so that I can look good for my husband/myself, and I am not only losing this weight so that I can demonstrate the importance of a healthy lifestyle to my son…but I am also doing this so that I can bring another little human into this world.

After a beautiful holiday season filled with cooking the largest most delicious meals, a Park City vacation in which diet was the least of our concerns, stuffing our faces with chocolates, and having a few too many beers, I can confidently say that I am ready for this change. My body has been begging for this change, and it is about time I listen to it. This year I will prove to myself that I am capable of accomplishing my goals. I will prove to myself that New Years resolutions CAN be fulfilled, and I will prove to everybody else that it is possible to be in better shape after a baby than you ever were before.

To put our plan into action, my husband and I invested in the newest p90x. I was always skeptical of workout videos prior to meeting my husband, however, he has completed the p90x program in the past and was very successful with it (that is, until I got pregnant and he joined me in my endeavors of eating for two!). Two days into the workouts it already became very clear to me that if done right, p90x will be very successful at whipping us into shape… By ‘it became very clear to me’ I mean that I have not been able to walk up the stairs without wincing for 3 days straight. In addition to our 7 day a week workouts, we will: go for long walks in the park on weekends, be drinking the suggested daily amount of water intake, going to bed earlier, drinking no alcohol (with the exception of the occasional glass.. Or 2..of red wine of course), eating no fast food, and we will be sticking to a very strict meal plan that contains primarily fruits, veggies, and protein.

Everybody may be seeing a little less of us. I may not be the ideal person to ask to go grab a burger with and I may not want to drink as much at social gatherings. I may decline an invite because I’ve got to work out, and I might not hang out as late because I’ve got to get my 8 hours of sleep. Call me boring, but I’ve got a bigger goal in mind. A goal that will lead to a healthier me, a more plentiful savings account, a husband who is even more attracted to me than he was when we met, a son who can see me as a healthy role model…and eventually this goal of mine will lead to Baby #2. With the goal on my mind, a positive outlook, a supportive community of friends/family, and a fridge full of meal prepped food containers, I WILL make 2015 my year. Let ‘Mission: get hot’ begin.

Cheers,

T.W.C.